nick jonas ellen
I always see greasy half-naked Chippendales hunks on The Ellen Show whenever I’m channel surfing in the middle of the day, and I’m like, “Bitch, aren’t you a fucking lesbian?” People gave Oprah shit for pandering to housewives, but Ellen takes the cake when it comes to getting middle-aged women wet for ratings.

I’m usually against Ellen’s gross man-candy shtick, but I can make an exception for cum dumpster Nick Jonas.

My boyfriend was on the heterosexual lesbian’s show to perform his smash hit single “Jealous,” and as usual, he sounded totally average but looked like absolute heaven.

Even fully-clothed he’s a walking boner, but Nicky Manaj can’t go anywhere without taking off his clothes, so he dropped his drawers and flaunted his thick thighs like he was starring in a Beyawnce music video.

gummy venus gif

Hmmm, Nick Jonas…

Head on over to Ellen Tube to check out Nick’s pants-less DJ set.