kylie fernando garibay
Kylie Minogue’s Kiss Me Once isn’t the worst washed-up pop diva album ever made (that honour goes to either Lotus or Britney Jean), but it was still nowhere near the level of Aphrodite . Or X… Or Body Language… Or Fever

Just when you thought that poor Kylie had jumped the shark for good after “Les Sex,” the pop princess has come out of nowhere to serve The Wire season 4 high-quality realness with a surprise four-track project with “Marry The Night”/”Stars Are Blind” mastermind Fernando Garibay.

And by the way, they’re real, and they’re spectacular!

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The songs, which are being used in a short film for Kylie’s Kiss Me Once tour, are everything anyone could want from the hotpants chanteuse today. Garibay’s production bridges the gap between the pure pop of Fever and Kylie’s more experimental records, like Impossible Princess and Body Language.

The best cut is “Chasing Ghosts,” which sounds like Britney’s “Soda Pop” and Heidi Montag’s “Your Love Found Me” joined forces and then got remixed by Best Coast.

Besides turning down the shitacular “Crazy Stupid Love” and making the flawless “Sexercize” music video, Roc Nation hasn’t done right by Kylie at all. If they haven’t already dropped her, then she needs to fire those flops and hire Fernando Garibay to executive-produce her next album. It’ll be like will.i.am handling Britney Jean or Jermaine Dupri doing The Elusive Chanteuse, except the good version that doesn’t totally blow and destroy the last remnants of the artist’s already flailing music career.