Britney Jean Artwork
I lost faith in Britney album covers after the terrifying cut & paste job of Blackout, but I thought that maybe things would change this era.

Instead, we’ve got Britney Jean makin’ half a derp face in what looks like an unusable outtake from an old photoshoot with some Bangerz font stuck over the top.

Why RCA, why?

T-ara Cry Cry Gif

Meanwhile, somewhere in the galaxy, Lady Gaga has released “a sequence of covers” for her new don’t-call-it-a-single, “Venus.”

Mother Monster looks like a naked Tilda Swinton with a scorpion on her face and a half-eaten bagel top in her mouth.

Farrah abraham Gif 3

I’m too scared of the Britney fans to say that I like the artpopsy “Venus” covers more than Britney Derp, so I’ll just say “Mazel tov, bitches!!!” and leave it at that.

Britney’s new Sia-penned single, “Perfume,” comes out on November 5, followed by the new album on December 3. I don’t know when the fuck “Venus” drops, but I’ll be listenin’ when it does.

Lady Gaga Venus 03 Lady Gaga Venus 02 Lady Gaga Venus 01