Bangerz is literally the most embarrassing and retarded album title I’ve ever heard in my entire life, but Miley Cyrus has managed to semi-save it with some seriously incredible cover art. Legend M is serving late-’80s-pop-culture-meets-cut-and-paste-trendy-tumblr-crap realness, and she looks absolutely amazing. It’s already ranking up there with f(x)’s Pink Tape for best covers of the year. Even better is Bangerz’s just-released second single, “Wrecking Ball,” which is probably going to become one of the biggest songs of the year.
There’s nothing worse in pop music than when someone takes a random object and writes a song around it (Demi Lovato’s “Skyscraper,” I’m looking at you), but leave it up to Miley to make it work. “Wrecking Ball” is a lighters-in-the-air ’80s power ballad put through the radio-friendly filter of Dr. Luke. It recalls everything from Bon Jovi’s “Bed of Roses” and Pat Benatar’s “We Belong” all the way to Miley’s own Hannah Montana hit, “The Climb.” Legend M already conquered this sound with Can’t Be Tamed’s “Every Rose Has Its Thorn,” but that was a Poison cover: “Wrecking Ball” is bigger, badder, and undeniably Miley.
It’s basically the perfect pop ballad.
You haters can waste your energy trashing “Wrecking Ball” if you want, but once you’ve heard it a couple of times on Z100 it’s going to become your new favourite song, so why fight it when Milegend’s already pre-snatched your wig? Just accept her as your official pop diva for 2013 and be done with it. I mean, really, who else are you going to stan for? Avril’s epic but she’s gonna flop, Rihanna’s boring, Beyonce’s Beyonce, Katy Perry’s busy remixing bad Sara Bareilles’ songs, Britney still hasn’t quite recovered from her lobotomy, Kylie doesn’t chart in the States, Ariana is a noob, and Gaga is too much of a mess to root for. Miley’s the only option.