Justin Timberlake Take Back The Night

Why oh why did I have to jerk off the second I woke up this morning? If I only I had waited a few precious minutes and checked the blogs first, then I could’ve beat my meat to Justin Timberlake’s “Take Back The Night” music video, or better yet, THIS EPIC SHIRTLESS PHOTO OF NICK JONAS ALL BUFF AND HUNKY.

Instead, like a total loser, I had to settle for user videos on DudesNude.

JT and Nicki are, like, two of my biggest celebrity crushes. They rate up there with all my other big ones: David Boreanaz during his Angel days; X-Files era David Duchovny; Norman Bates, both from the original Psycho and Bates Motel; B.A.P’s Bang Yong Guk; SHINee’s Jonghyun; Edward in Twilight; TVXQ’s Yunho; Evan Peters, both as himself and his characters from American Horror Story; Shane from The Walking Dead before that hatin’ ass Rick killed him; and Ralph Macchio, of course.

I can’t bust another nut once I’m done. I’m not built like that. It takes me a bit to regroup before I can go again. Now I’m going to have to wait till lunchtime or something to really get the most out of JT and Nicki’s visual blessings.

If I had these two in my lair, it would be AWN. It’d be some real no-holds-barred shit — nothing’s off the table!

Enjoy these two gifts from the gods, below.

Nick Jonas